Our 8th Anniversary

My husband and I just celebrated 8 years of marriage last night. On one hand, it doesn't seem like we have been married that long and on the other hand - it seems longer - like we have been together for ever. We started dating, though, 12 years ago.
The first time I remember seeing him, it was Parents Weekend at the college. That year I was a Senior in Highschool. He was playing soccer and I loved just looking at him. I would go to the college with my mother throughout the year. Mom went to watch my brothers play basketball, I went to go watch this cute guy. Come to find out later, that he had noticed me too. Back in highschool, all I could think about was him. One of my friends even said to me that I would probably end up marrying him. I just thought that was ridiculous - every gorgeous guy that I had a crush on had no idea I was alive.
He was the deciding factor of why I chose to go to that college - probably not the best reason in deciding to go to a college - but I was young and it turned out all good. He asked me out almost immediately and the rest is history. We, of course, had many ups and downs. He has taught me alot and I hope that I have taught him too - I think I have. It is amazing that in 8
(12?) years we have grown so much alike. What I can't get over is the fact of how much I love him. I sometimes wonder why I married him - I didn't appreciate him as much as I should have or loved him as much as I should have. But I suppose that is how it is suppose to be, growing appreciation for your spouse through the years. It can hold a marriage together in tough times. I think that is God's plan.
That brings me to my comment and I am sure I will have some who will disagree with me, but I will state it anyway. I think that as long as any man and any woman are Christians and they are trying to live as Christ did and stick to God's commands, they can be married happily. If they,"do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better then themselves" and if they "look not only to their own interests, but also to the interests of others." (Philippians 2:3&4) I know that my marriage has a long way to go, let's face it we are selfish beings. My husband and I don't always see eye to eye. He is a great guy and he amazes me with all he can do, but he may not have been the right guy for me. Maybe no one was the right one for me. I do know that it doesn't matter anymore, because He is a Christian. I do know, now, that he is the perfect one for me. We still have a lot of growing and learning, but I am thankful for my husband. The one thing that I need to get better at is praying daily for my husband. I think that is my new goal for our 9th year. I have tried in the past, but making time for quiet time is hard. Please keep me accountable about praying time for my husband.
If you are married, you might need a little marriage enrichment. Go to marriage.eharmony.com You will take a quiz and get some insights to your marriage. Kirk and I are in the middle of using their free offer( some of it costs money though). I will let you know what I think about it in another blog. God Bless and I hope that God is in your marriage. That is the only way to be married.

Rebecca

What Do You Do All Day?

A man came home from work and found his three
Children outside, still
In their pajamas, playing in the mud, with empty
Food boxes and wrappers
Strewn all around the front yard.

The door of his wife's car was open, as was
The front door to the house
And there was no sign of the dog. Proceeding
Into the entry, he found
An even bigger mess. A lamp had been knocked
Over, and the throw rug was
Wadded against one wall.

In the front room the TV was loudly blaring a
Cartoon channel, and the family room was strewn with toys
And various items of clothing.

In the kitchen, dishes filled the sink,
Breakfast food was spilled on the
Counter, the fridge door was open wide, dog
Food was spilled on the floor,
a broken glass lay under the table, and a
Small pile of sand was spread
By the back door.

He quickly headed up the stairs, stepping over
Toys and more piles of
Clothes,looking for his wife. He was worried
She might be ill, or that
Something serious had happened.

He was met with a small trickle of water as it
Made its way out the bathroom door.

As he peered inside he found wet towels,
Scummy soap and more toys
Strewn over the floor. Miles of toilet paper lay in a
Heap and toothpaste had been
Smeared over the mirror and walls.

As he rushed to the bedroom, he found his wife
Still curled up in the bed
In her pajamas, reading a novel. She looked up
At him, smiled, and asked how his day went.
He looked at her bewildered and asked, "What
Happened here today?"

She again smiled and answered, "You know every
Day when you come home
From work and you ask me what in the world I do all
Day?"

"Yes," was his incredulous reply.

She answered, "Well, today I didn't do it."

The other day a newly married lady without kids and pursuing her career asked me what I did that day. She was just just trying to make conversation. I thought for a moment and then I said, "Not much." I just couldn't think of anything to say that was that exciting. I got the kids breakfast, I got them dressed, I got their hair and teeth brushed, I got them busy doing something while I cleaned up and took care of the baby. I did some activities with the kids - then "Oh, look at the time it is time for lunch!" I quickly try to whip up something for lunch - clean up, put the kids down for a nap. Oh the baby woke up - spend time with the baby as I try to pick up and make the house look presentable - maybe set down and rest. The kids are up, I get them busy while I make supper - cleanup - maybe a bath and then to bed.
Just recently someone sent me the above email and it hit home - I spend my day doing things that make it look like I haven't done much. My husband has also made the comment that he could get more done in a day if he stayed home with the kids. I actually do not doubt that he could get more visible things done. It is easy to sit them in front of the T.V. while you get things done and I must admit that I do use this technique more than I like to admit, but I do know that I try to spend time with them. How many times have I sat in the bathroom with my child for more than 20 minutes trying to potty train them or helping them have a bowel movement? How many times has it taken a whole morning trying to pick up and organize a whole playroom instead of throwing it all in the toy box. How many times have I burnt dinner because I had to help a child who needed me? How many times have I sat wondering if my sick child is sick enough to see the doctor? How many times have a sat and read "one more story." I could keep going. Could I be a little bit more organized and disciplined - yes - but please understand that a mother can be busy doing important work without getting the visible work accomplished. I did get pretty sick this spring and I was laid up for awhile. I think that through that time, my husband did start to understand what goes on daily with little children and he doesn't make comments like that anymore.