Depression and Young Mothers

I have received some good ideas for my speaking engagement. I am still not absolutely sure about the flow of it. I have been working on some thoughts and researching them. So I am going to throw them out there and see if I get any comments on them. My research is from the American Psychiatric Association website and the National Institute of Mental Health website.

"Women are approximately two times more likely than men to suffer from major depression and dysthymia."

"Women's risk of depressive symptoms and demoralization is higher among mothers of young children and increases with the number of children in the house."

"Significant loss, a difficult relationship, financial problems, or a major change in life pattern have all been cited as contributors to depressive illness."

"Persons with certain characteristics - pessimistic thinking, low self esteem, a sense of having little control over life events, and a tendency to worry excessively - are more likely to develop depression."

"A variety of factors unique to women's lives are suspected to play a role in developing depression. Research is focused on understanding these, including: reproductive, hormonal, genetic or other biological factors, abuse and oppression; interpersonal factors; and certain psychological and personality characteristics. And yet, specific causes of depression in women remain unclear; many women exposed to these factors do not develop depression."

"Stresses include major responsibilities at home and work, single parenthood, caring for children and aging parents. How these factors may uniquely affect women is not yet fully understood."

"For both women and men, rates of major depression are highest among the separated and divorced, and lowest among the married, while remaining always higher for women than for men. The quality of a marriage, however, may contribute significantly to depression. Lack of an intimate, confiding relationship, as well as overt marital disputes, have been shown to be related to depression in women. In fact, rates of depression were shown to be highest among unhappily married women."

"Researchers have confirmed that hormones have an effect on brain chemistry that controls emotions and mood; a specific biological mechanism explaining hormonal involvement is not known, however."

"In addition, motherhood may be a time of heightened risk for depression because of the stress and demands it imposes."

Now, I don't want to make this research fit how I want it to, but coming from my own personal experiences and experiences of others, I am going to try to make some statements that make sense to me. I never felt like I had the baby blues - the few months after having the baby- but there have been times in my young mother life that I have felt "blue-ish." I mean, why not - hormones, tiredness, worrying, loss of control, financial problems, marital problems. Having children is a huge change in a couple's life and whether we like it or not. Then the hormones - being tired after staying up with sick kids or trying to get them to sleep, worring about the children's saftey and health and education, feeling a loss of control when the children don't behave perfectly -( wouldn't it be nice if the children always acted the way they were suppose to?), saving money on the children's ever changing wardrobes and cutting costs on the groceries, and marital problems! Isn't it a given that among all that choas there will be some marital problems? Every individual has different issues, they also handle them all differently - but shouldn't we expect that mothers of young children will feel depressed at times. There are so many expectations of mothers and unless a woman has someone to speak with on these issues, why wouldn't she be depressed? Doesn't that make you want to call up a mother of young children right now and ask her what you can do to help? What is it about women that have already been through that time in their life - it is like they have forgotten how hard it is and since they have gotten through it - so can young mothers of today.

I just want to end this post with a story about a friend. She has three young children. She worries about her children's health often - for good reason. Her husband doesn't work close to home, so he isn't at home every night. She feels like a single parent most of the time. Recently, she has had some health issues as well. Now tell me why she shouldn't feel a little blue at times and that maybe I should be concerned about her well being? Some mothers told me the other night that being a mother doesn't get easier. I felt like they were downplaying this season of my life - but I don't think that I totally agree with them. Of course I will always be concerned about my children, but these three little ones that I have now are so dependent on me - they are very needy. That is a little overwhelming.

I guess what my thought is, I think that many young mothers may suffer from depression of some sort from time to time. And that made me think of some scripture - "Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers." 1 Peter 3:7